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Monday, May 30, 2011

goodbye May and hello to you, June


hye readers and bloggers. like I said before, wow it is been a long time time time ago I am not babbling in my own blog. idea dah tak berapa nak ada. so taknak tinggal berhabuk tu pergi buat entry gegambar *erk* quite a long time gak lah nak main-main mybaby tu sigh. betol lah orang cakap kan bila dah masuk working environment ni jangan harapler derr masa lapang tu ada macam kita study dulu. makin sempit adelah adoihhh (--'')

saya nak bercerita pasal cinta, boleh? actually bukan 100% about love but it is more about hope and faith. semalam hari yang luar biasa. sebab unexpectedly happened. quote says "the best relationships usually begin unexpectedly" hehehe betol ke tak? let me introduce a little bit about him. currently, a guy I dated now. we get to know each other accidentally, kot. thru Facebook HAHA. zaman dulu famous kenal thru MiRC, Friendster, Myspace etc. orang cakap jangan terjebak dengan cinta siber ini. padah katanya. tu orang zaman dulu kala =p

on 26th of August 2010, he approched me by commented at one of my friend's picture. kebetulan dalam tu ada gambar saya. masa tu kan tak kerja lagi so of course lah setiap masa je online. hihi. dia puji saya comel *awwwwww* terkesima segan sepi silu semua ada tapi hmmpphh memang berani betol lah mamat ni puji aku comel. tak takut langsung! I asked my friend, who is he? she said that was her junior. junior? what do you guys expect from that? of course lah weh younger than me. tapi takpe kawan-kawan je kan so apa salahnya. so heee there you go, he was younger than me, one year :)

okay tu je nak cerita. tak best pun hahahaha. humm... so far berkawan dengan dia ini agak banyak jugalah menyedarkan saya tentang kehidupan. well, pemikiran yang agak matang. it is good for me to ask any advice or story-telling with him about my problem etc. and of course lah sepanjang berkawan dengan dia, there were obstacles and problems also. saling tolak menolak, sepi menyepi, undur mengundur aihhh. ada je yang tak kena but in the end... quote says "if someone seriously wants to be a part of your life, they will seriously make an effort to be in it"

bercerita pasal semalam. yeah he is surprising me! datang ke Kuantan okay all over from Ipoh mali ^_^ hahahahaha macam dah expect tapi tak berani nak berharap nanti harapan hancur berkecai so just fikir ada, ada lah tu. if takde nak buat macam mana takde rezeki. no wonder I am asking he what he is up to but he didn't reply my question but kept answering the other questions. bijak betol anda tidak menipu saya =p saya terharu dan terkejut kot bila nampak dia di hadapan mata. dia datang ke tempat saya bekerja, ECM. rindu. satu perkataan menggambarkan kesemuanya. being struggled driving 5 hours from his hometown and then will be leaving to KL at the same night. penat kot! tapi takpe I am pretty sure it is worth kan? pasni tatau bila boleh jumpa lagi (-_-)''

so I brought him to Teluk Chempedak. kempunan nak makan McD. bukan suka sangat pergi pantai ni. si dia suka pantai tapi saya tak HAHAHAHAHA. nak ikutkan persamaan kiteorang ialah all about photography tapi tak juga sebab dia pengguna Canon and I am Nikon-ian. banyak gak argue pasal kamera nih aihhhh tapi tabik spring sebab knowledge dia pasal kamera ni banyak. hek hek hek tak macam saya, pemalas nak membaca menambah ilmu. so sedut jelah mana yang boleh ;p

sambil makan-makan *saya je yang makan ekceli* kami berborak pasal semua benda. one thing yang tak boleh lepas adalah pasal kamera, lens, kamera, lens, gambar huhuhu nasib baiklah aku minat kalau tak mau jadi gila dapat bf camni. dalam erti kata lain BORING! erm tak terlepas pasal serius part. bukan cakap pasal kahwin pun, pasal future pun tak juga tapi keadaan sekarang. nak ikutkan saya dan dia tengah amik risiko. yeah a big risk. there is always a big chance for us to get broken hearted, again. if nak ignore pun, it is just for a while and then kept thinking all over again.

"You are the risk I'll take right now because I fight for what I love"
- Anonymous

saya yakin, insya Allah his parent dapat terima saya. before ni pun isu macam ni dah come out pun. his mother kinda disagree if he wants to be with me, be his wife. fuuuuuuu tersedak dia. macam mana lah tak sentap kan? unexpected answer from his mom. tak expect pun dapat jawapan camtu fuuu fuuu. apetah lagi tuan punya badan ni haa. sakit gak lah. nangis gak lah mengenang nasib. kan dah cakap dulu lagi, it is not easy to be me. hehehehe terbukti right? for me it is better to know and be dissappointed than to never know and always wonder. penat nak teka meneka ni. sebab dia berubah sedikit so I expect mesti ada benda yang terjadi kat dia.

tapi tu dulu. sekarang lain. yes, he is willing to fight for us. tapi just take it easy. saya pun takde lah nak push-push sebab takkan ke mana. insya Allah there will be an answer for all these messes. and personally, saya pun tatau saya boleh cope with the answers if jawapannya will lead us to broken-hearted again. semuanya berserah kepada Allah. He knows better from us. even saya benci ayat "ada jodoh tak kemana..." tapi fuuuuu that is the reality. always sucks. he said he will search the right time to talk about me to his dad. Alhamdulillah, at least he wants to try :) :) :) and I have faith in you.

sekejap je pun dapat jumpa. malam tadi gerak balik KL at 12pm. at least... pasni tatau lah dapat jumpa bila. sebab masing-masing ada komitmen tersendiri kat negeri masing-masing. dia pun just tunggu posting je as a teacher, somewhere in Ipoh. good luck for your future! and chase your dream first and after 2 years established dah boleh fikir pasal another step. tak merancang pun sebab takut tak menjadi. always go with an adhoc plan. sebab plan tu lah yang selalu menjadi HAHAHAHAHA. I always laugh to keep my heart in the safe mode :'D

when you finally let go of the past,
something better comes along

to you:

"Do not give up, the beginning is always the hardest"
- Anonymous


xoxo



always have faith
and hope

6 COMMENTS:

Azra Yukiko said...

wee, love this entry.
go sha!!

Dea said...

cantekk header baru..:)

Shahira said...

thanks azra ^_^

Shahira said...

hehehe tu edit je miss dea ;)

MiYOKO SuKi said...

waaa..cayok2...suka entry ni, sha... :)

selalunye bnda yg kite plan, selalu tak menjadi..baik tak yah plan kann... :)

Shahira said...

Sll cmtula kan?
Ntah2 karma yg menetapkan cmtu heeee ;)